This might just be the year

Remember the movie " The boy in the Bubble?" Ya know, the one about the boy who has a damaged immune system, so he's forced to live in a very sterile environment inside a plastic bubble?

Well, every year I threaten my family that this year will be the year. The year that I force my family to live in a plastic bubble.

Usually the threats don't start until sometime around Dec., when all the snotty nosed kids at school start infecting my angels with all their nasty little germs. Schools are, of course, just one big petri dish of disease.

This year, however the plagues have already started.

Last week my oldest son was home for 2 days with an incredibly disgusting cold.

A few days later, the z-man stayed home with a slight fever and was feeling "blobby".
( he likes to make up words to describe his various illnesses).

Then, yesterday, the z-man gets a fever of 103 and white pus on his tonsils. He slept ALL DAY. The boy was one sick pup.

I hate, hate, hate it when the kiddos are sick. Especially when they use words like weak, shakey, blobby and dying to describe how they are feeling. And when they feel so bad they start crying. That's when my imagination goes into overdrive. I become convinced that the sick child is becoming severely dehydrated, has meningitis or perhaps polio. That's right, I am convinced that my child will be the first child to contract polio in 50 years. Or maybe it's whooping cough or scarlet fever or pneumonia, or mad cow disease, or the asian bird flue or perhaps they're the victim of biological warfare.

I'm a mom. It's my job to worry about the worst case scenario.

So, with three illnesses already in the books since school started, I'm predicting that this just might be " the year".

Just in case I think I'll start collecting supplies...bubble wrap, plastic wrap, tarps, air filtration systems and LOTS and LOTS of LYSOL.

Teetering on the brink

After being without power for 4 days last week and spending the last several weeks deciding whether we should build on the lot we've had for 2 years ( we've decided to keep trying to sell the lot) I was REALLY, REALLY looking forward to some coffee and gab time with my friend, Deb. Deb and I have so much in common and we actually have intellectually stimulating conversations ( as opposed to the ongoing dialogue about the latest wii game or high school drama I have daily with the kiddos). The truth is, Deb is my ONLY friend. I mean, I have aquaintances and some other moms I make small talk with, but Deb's the only friend I have that I share the down and dirty stuff of life with. I feel somewhat deficient because I only have one friend. I envy the blogs of other women who have several girlfriends that get together regularly. I suspect something about me is deeply flawed and that I am missing out on what every other woman on the planet seems to have. But I digress.

The point of this all is that my coffee times with Deb keep me sane and my sanity is teetering on the edge as of late. So, I was totally stoked about coffee with Deb.

So, OF COURSE, the z-man wakes up this morning and declares that he is TIRED and has a BAD HEADACHE. I tell him in my most nurturing voice " that's too bad, you're going to school, I'm sure you'll feel better". ( You're NOT going to ruin my coffee date).

In the car on the way to school, he's still complaining. I give him half an advil and assure him that he'll feel much better by the time we pull into the school parking lot. ( Please, God, let the advil work)

So, I'm practically pushing the boy out of the van when he appeals to me one final time. I reluctantly kiss his forehead and sure enough the little guy has a fever.

The poor guy is sick and all I care about is my fragile sanity. I very reluctantly and with a bit of resentment bring the boy back home. HE BETTER NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT A REMARKABLE RECOVERY IN A COUPLE OF HOURS. And may god help him if he refuses to take a nap.

Coffee and gab time will have to wait for another day.

Diary of a Power Outage

Day 1
Wind has been picking up all day. Electricity has been flickering on and off. Pray outloud " God, pleeeeaase don't let our electricity go out"

6pmish- God answers my prayer with a resounding "Ha, No!" as the lights go off with a loud SNAP! I strongly suspect that He has decided that some lessons in patience, humility and gratitude far outweigh the temporary comforts of electricity.

6:15 - discover that the neighbors across the street still have their electricity. Ever since we moved into our home 7 years ago, the same 12 homes lose power anytime someone sneezes while the rest of the families in our little community have power. I try not to hate them.

7:30pm- have dragged out all the lanterns, candles and flashlights. We are prepared! I feel quite smug and know that I am the best mom in the entire world. ( well, except for the fact that I claimed the best lantern for myself which I feel a bit guilty about, but I AM the Queen PUBAH of my home after all!)

7:35 -husband and I decide to go ahead and go to bed ( operating on our favorite coping method of " just sleeping through the crisis")

Day 2
6:30 am - wake up to sound of hubby's annoying watch alarm after long night of no sleep. We had to sleep with the windows open do to the heat which set off hubby's allergies. He sneezed and blew his nose ALL NIGHT! I decide to vote him off the island. Light candles, turn on lanterns. Discover that kids have no school due to no electricity. Tell teenager who has already showered to go back to sleep.

7am- 10 year old z-man wakes up. I encourage him to go back to sleep. He won't hear of it.

7:01- z-man announces that he is booored. Brace myself for a loooong day ahead and pray to God for patience ( one of His ongoing goals for me, I believe)

8:30 - house is bombarded by 3 other 10 year old boys. They are quite loud at the prospects of a no school day ahead. Teenage daughter grumpily emerges from cave and yells at boys for being so loud.

8:35- I suggest that the boys go to one of their houses that actually has electricity. I had previously come to the conclusion that all the 10 year old boys within a mile radius of our home gather here because of the computers, wii and playstation. I was wrong. They want to stay here, despite our lack of gaming. I cannot fathom why they insist on staying here with a hormonally homicidal mother.

9:00 - boys play their 30th game of hide and go seek. Doors slam, boys shriek. After calmly asking them to go outside and play, I lose my patience ( I know, God,)and yell loudly " GO OUTSIDE, NOW!"

5pm- husband comes home after work. Announce that the electric company says we will have electricity in 4 more days. WHAT!!!!!!! Remind myself that at least we have a home and hot water and food. ( see God? I have gratitude!)

7:30- I head to bed again hoping to sleep through the next 4 days.

Day 3

Yippee!! kids have school. Look forward to quiet day ahead.

Enjoy a day of reading and yardwork uninterrupted by kids. Convince myself that this whole no electricity thing isn't so bad after all.

3:30 pm- kids come home. 10 year olds descend on house. Hide and go seek games begin. My hope fades.

6:45pm- It's already dark. I go to bed. Don't fall asleep for 4 hours, don't get up cuz what's the point?

Day 4

2 girl teens have picture day at school today. Insist on getting to school 30 minutes early to put on make-up and straighten hair. I don't understand why it should take that long since it only takes me 20 minutes from shower to ready to go. Make the mistake of passing on this observation to teens. Am met with rolling eyes.

I have now had 3 mornings without my early morning coffee. Order the Large coffee at the drive through. Pick up a couple of Dr. Peppers at the gas station. Days without electricity require vast quantities of caffeine. It's a scientific fact.

Day 5

Let me share some power outage tips:
1. when all lit, variety of scented candles produce a very nauseating stink.
2. Tapered candles give off best light
3. don't wait until day 4 to look for power generator. The other 200,000 people also still without electricity had the foresight to snatch them up on day 2.
4. libraries frown upon teenagers trying to charge their cell phones in the library bathroom.

I see fleets of electric trucks around the nearby city of Lancaster on way to school. Ask oldest daughter if she has a gun. Wonder if I can hijack an electric crew with a ball point pen.

8pm - electricity restored!!!!!!!! 10 year old immediately turns on tv to watch spongebob. Teens reconnect online. Hubby asks if I had cleaned out fridge of rotting food. Ummmm...I thought about it a couple of times, but kept putting it off. The stink that ememrges from the fridge gags the whole family including the poodle who likes to roll in her own poop. Family votes me off the island. I'm o.k. with that.